


For He Had Eyes and Chose Me

by Sidekick_Theory



Series: The Glowing Alternative [1]
Category: Football RPF
Genre: Fingering, First Time, Fluff and Angst, Gay Sex, M/M, My First Fanfic, Top!Leo, bottom!Ney, i guess its an au, unneccesary fighting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-24
Updated: 2015-05-24
Packaged: 2018-03-31 23:27:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3997204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sidekick_Theory/pseuds/Sidekick_Theory
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Leo was already having a bad day, he didn't need to make it was worst by snapping at Neymar, but he did. Now Neymar is equally as angry. As they come to terms with all their emotions, a decision will have to be made.</p>
            </blockquote>





	For He Had Eyes and Chose Me

**Author's Note:**

> So hopefully it's not that blatantly obvious (other than this being the only work I have on my account), but this is my first fanfic. I have never before been inspired to write one of these until I saw the complete adorableness that is Neymessi. I love these 2 guys so much I made them have gay sex together. Obvious I have a weird way of showing my gratitude for them. I might make a next part to this, I haven't decided so feedback of any kind is welcomed. It is my first one so there is sure to be mistakes.

“Where are you going? We’re not done talking!”

Leo ignored Antonella as he made his way throughout the house. He had a game in 3 hours and he needed to leave now. There no longer was time to discuss this dilemma with her. It was bad enough that she already troubled him with her words. 

It was just so perplexing that, after all this time, Anto still somehow found a way to bring it up right before he had to leave, only to yell at him when he returned for leaving in the middle of the argument. At this point, he had nothing more to say to her until the doctor called back. 

He made a stop to pick up his bag on the counter and to give Thiago a kiss on the crown of his head. 

‘At least you were made out of love’ Leo thought bitterly as he passed Anto in the kitchen. He made his way to the door quickly, Anto screaming at him the whole way. 

“Do you even care?” she asked. And with that he left, slamming the door.

 

Leo arrived at Camp Nou later then he usually did. It wasn’t that he was particularly first all the time, but he was never last. Of course, he could never be last. Not with people such as Neymar and Dani on the team. Leo moved out of his car and into the path of the duo.

“Lionel Messi showing up just in time for such an important game? Are they all the same to you now? Did you just forget we were playing Atletico Madrid today?” Dani teased, reaching to pinch Leo’s sides. Leo jumped out of the way, only to stumble into Neymar’s vibrating chest. Their laughter just fueled his already sullen mood. He pushed away Neymar’s arms that seemed to have found their way around his waist. 

He continued into the facility. He stopped to talk to one of the reporters for only a minute, because of his hurry. He answered two of their questions, “How does this game compare to others?” (They are a hard opponent, and a win would include vital points for the title), “After your spectacular game last week, how do you plan to continue your lead over Ronaldo for goals?” (I’m not worried about how many goals I score, I care about winning and working as a team). At this point, Neymar and Dani had showed up beside him talking to the other reporters. Leo observed that Neymar’s inquirer was a beautiful blonde that wasn’t concerned with his thoughts on the game ahead. The reporter’s suggestive stance and increased giggling every time Neymar spoke was enough to show Leo that their conversation was about something other than the impending match. Leo nodded at the rest of the reporters and walked out of the room. 

When Leo go to the locker room, most of his teammates had already finished dressing. They were waiting to be told to go to the field and warm-up. Leo went straight to his cubby and changed into his warm-up shirt and pants. He sat down to configure his shoes, socks, and shin guards right as Neymar hopped over his bag to reach his own cubby. The aggressive movement prompted Leo to give Neymar a glare. Upon seeing his teammate’s disgust, Neymar apologized and continued on charging.

 

“Look I know this is one hell of an important game, but you shouldn’t be this stressed before we go out. It will mess with your head and stuff and the last thing I need is an unhappy Messi ruining my vibe,” Neymar explained. He rubbed Leo’s shoulders while they stood at the top of the stairs to go onto the field. Leo shrugged his hands off and walked further down the stairs towards Gerard. He ignored the dejected look in Neymar’s eyes as he completely disregarded his encouragement. 

They ran out onto the field with thousands of screams around them. Leo learned to deal with them long ago, but usually they would still give him a feeling of glee in his stomach. Today, though, he felt nothing. Not even the sight of the field gave him the joyful feeling he got as he stepped onto it. 

His kicks were all over the place and his ball control had all but disappeared as he warmed-up. He pondered why no one had come over yet and just put him out of his misery for his incompetence of anything athletic. He pretended not to see the worry in Neymar’s eyes as he sent another game soaring over the net. No one else seemed to notice his poor play expect for him. The others seemed optimistic that he would score the next one, but Leo knew better. He had been in the sport so long he knew when he was having an off day. And even though on an off day for him, he was still the best on the team, Leo never believed he was better and personally took account for everyone’s mistakes. This mentality never did amount to anything good.

Neymar’s concerned had increased greatly by the time they lined-up to start the game. At that point, he was so distraught with Leo’s attitude and actions that he actually considered telling their coach to sit him out for the game, lest Leo had a stroke from exasperation. He had seen Leo upset before a game before, but never like this. His attention span lasted long enough to hear the importance of the conversation, and then he tuned the rest of it out staring off into space. He seemed anxious, too, which was also not a good sign. 

The whistle blew to signal the beginning of the first half. Neymar no longer had time to worry about Leo’s problems. He had enough of his own to deal with, and they’re names were Juanfran and Godin.

 

“Those damn refs,” Geri muttered.

The team had gone back in the locker room for half time. Atletico were winning 1-0 as a result of poorly called penalty in the box. The opponent tripped and flew into Gerard causing a tough collision right outside the 6”. The ref had given Geri a yellow immediately. Their protest were futile. The other team sent the ball flying into the top left corner, out of Claudio’s reach. 

The deficit put everyone on edge. If that card hadn’t have been enough, the ref also had given Busquets and Jordi both ones, too. The fouls were 2-10, a very unfair calling in such a physical game from both sides. Suarez and Neymar were completely hindered useless by the fouls. Every time they touched the ball they were dropped on their ass. Their cries were heard to no avail. Leo had been pushed around a few times too, but that was only when he actually went up for offense. His defense strategy today was not helping. 

The team gathered around to hear their coach speak to them. He had no other words than to tell them to continue to fight. He spoke individually to Leo about forgetting the first half and coming out to really play in the second. Leo’s mood had been shot long before the game started, but now it was dead. He had no other feeling than anger and he needed to release it. It wasn’t his fault Neymar was the first to try and talk to him.

“Hey, we’ll get them in the second. We just need a lucky break away to tie the game and then we getting it flowing. I know you’re not having the best day, but you shouldn’t lose faith. We’ve come back before,” Neymar said sitting next to Leo.

Leo just couldn’t control his anger anymore. “I don’t need you to tell me how to play. I am far more experienced than you about these things. You think I need you to tell me I’m not doing well? That I shouldn’t lose faith? I know these things on my own thank you very much. Why are we even talking about my performance when it is obviously yours that is lacking?” Leo exploded.

“What do you mean?”

Leo scoffed, “What do I mean? I mean that we’d be winning 3-1 if you could just tap the ball in the right direction, but you seem utterly incapable of doing even that! Of course, that’s only when you stay on your feet long enough to shoot the ball. Really you should audition for a movie with those fake falls you keep acting out. You clearly are off your game today.”

Neymar eyes widened in shock and confusion. Leo never ever yells at people for how they’re playing. He usually constructs them on how to do better, but never does he out right criticize them like he did to Neymar. Now, sure, Neymar wasn’t doing his best today. He had missed a few chances, but Leo hadn’t had any. He was playing far better than Leo was today. 

“Well at least I get up and down the field, you decrepit old man!” Neymar shot back after a brief moment of hesitation. “Not only can’t you get in range to shoot the ball, but you lose the ball every single time you touch it!” Neymar continued to think about how the game was going. The more he thought about Leo, the more he got irritated. At this point Leo had stood up right in front of Neymar to get the advantage. This backfired immediately when Neymar took that moment to stand up, too. They were right in each other’s faces, glaring with intensity to kill. 

Geri and Javier decided that that was the time to intervene. Javier grabbed Leo around the chest. He pulled him back and wrapped his one leg around Leo’s so he couldn’t move. This was a relatively easy process, since Leo willingly went back.

Geri, on the other hand, had a more difficult time restraining Neymar. 

Neymar’s frustration had grown more with every passing moment. He was already having a hard of enough time fighting off Atletico, he didn’t want to fight his own team, too. And worst of all it was Lionel Messi. Leo, his best friend and most idolized player in the world. Neymar had a hard time accepting Leo’s analyzes about his performance. He carved Leo’s approval the most out of anyone. And here Leo was degrading him for his hard work.

Neymar fought Geri’s restriction insistently. He didn’t know what he wanted to do, but he didn’t want anyone to feel him shaking. 

“Besides,” Neymar spoke, finally letting Geri pull him back, “There’s literally nothing I can do about falling. I have my legs swiped from under me every time I receive the ball around Juanfran,” he looked straight in Leo’s eyes, “He’s out for blood and you know it! I can’t even count on the refs to call anything, since they haven’t all game, so why would I think falling on my ass instead of going to goal would help?” Neymar’s anger and frustration shone out brighter at that moment. Leo knew that Juanfran’s hatred for Neymar was strong and ever present in the fouls he committed today, but Leo refused to blame himself for the game right now. He took his aggravation out on Neymar because he had been there and Leo knew he was very susceptible when it came to him. He didn’t think Neymar would actually defend himself against him, nor did he think he would take it this hard. 

Neymar’s glare held Leo’s eyes as Geri walked him into another room to calm him down. At the last second, he looked away in anguish, freeing his arm to wipe his frustrated tears. Javier was trying to talk to Leo, but he just tuned him out and opted to go to the bathroom. He threw water on his face. He tried to calm himself down. He couldn’t look in the mirror. He couldn’t see himself as a man who yells at his dearest friends when a situation was out of their control. It was bad enough that he was having a bad game, but Neymar having one too right now would certify their loss. Leo wished to go back and apologize, but Suarez came in to tell him they had to go back for the second half. 

As he walked to the tunnel with Suarez, he saw Geri leaning over Neymar with one arm as Neymar leaned against the wall. Neymar was staring at his shoes as Geri spoke to him. He would nod once in a while to show that he was listening, but, other than that, he could have been asleep, slumped against the wall for what it looked like. His lack of movement showed Leo that Neymar had already checked out of the game. Leo must have been staring at Neymar for longer than he thought, because when he turned to face Suarez, he shook his head and said, “You can fix that later, let’s worry about the game right now. He’ll forgive you, he always does.”

Leo nodded and started to focus on the game. Before they went out on the field though, Leo’s vision was directed back to Neymar, like always. He watched Geri move closer to Neymar to keep the conversation hushed. He ignored the feeling in his stomach when he saw Neymar look up at Geri with a smile, his pointed canines on full display. That was until Neymar’s eyesight shifted to Leo’s. 

It was as if the smile was never there.

Leo longer to hear what Geri and Neymar were talking about, but they were ushered onto the field before he could ask. Leo just prayed that they could win the game and that no one would get hurt before it was over, especially Neymar.

 

In seemingly minutes into the half, Neymar scored the equalizer. After a pass from Jordi, he dribbled through 3 defenders. He was almost knocked down twice with complaints everywhere for a foul. Nevertheless, Neymar slotted the ball past the goalie. Leo watched the scene from about the half line. Once he saw Neymar take off with the ball, he began to run faster to catch up. When Neymar scored, a feeling of excitement and guilt washed over him. He was happy that they were tied, but the fact that Neymar was the one to score after what he had said made the dread in his stomach enhance.

The team gathered around for their usual celebratory hug. Leo arrived last. He piled onto the others back with his arms around Busquets and Rakitic. Dani broke away from Neymar to hug Leo as everyone started to break apart. Hands of all different kinds somehow found their way on him. Head pats, slaps, and fist bumps found his body in one way or another. Leo barely acknowledged them as he made his way to Neymar, who was caught in an iron grip by Geri’s hug. He broke away with a smile, finding Leo’s eyes instantaneously. His smile faded into a smirk and a head shake. He began to walk back to the center line, foregoing his usual personal celebrations, not giving Leo anytime to catch up. 

Leo’s mood damped further at Neymar’s rejection, but his motivation to prove his worth increased. 

Neymar scored again within the next 10 minutes. Leo was the next one to assist him. Their fight did nothing to muddle their obvious magnetism on the field. Leo flicked the ball over the defenders head from the right. Neymar ran up on it and dribbled until he got to the goalie. He propped the ball up over his head. It found the back of the net easily. This time Leo made sure to get to Neymar first. Before Neymar could escape, Leo slammed into him with a bone-crushing hug. Leo stayed in Neymar’s reluctant arms until the uneasy feeling was too much to ignore. They broke apart, too quickly for Leo’s liking, right as the others began to arrive. Neymar’s death stare at Leo was hidden by the group hug that commenced. Leo shivered from its intensity.

‘Wow, I really fucked up,’ Leo thought as he walked away. At this point, he was so frustrated, he thought he might cry. He had never made someone this angry at him before. It would have been fine if it was anyone else but Neymar. Neymar was always a constant in his life. He could count on him for anything. While everyone else in his life were changing, getting older, wiser, more idiotic, Neymar was the same happy, joyous boy he met years ago. Maybe that’s why he liked Neymar so much. Maybe that was why he was so completely distraught about Neymar’s reaction. He knew Neymar was a fighter, and he knew that he shouldn’t have snapped at him that way, but this intense of an annoyance Neymar felt for Leo was puzzling to him. He thought that it would fade away immediately after Neymar had calmed down. He knew Neymar wouldn’t be mad at him forever, but he needed him right now. 

With all the shit going on in his life, Leo at least thought that he could rely on playing a good game with his friends. Leo wished he could take all he said back, but he knew he couldn’t now. Anto had put him in horrible mood. He kept his frustration bottled up inside for too long. He knew that it would catch up to him at some point, he just wished he would’ve had more control. He knew that he shouldn’t have taken it out on Neymar. Neymar was fragile. He acted like nothing hurt him, but Leo knew he had fears like the rest of them. Along with being the best attacking duo in football, they were close friends outside of the field. They would go to each other’s house and hang out like normal friends. Sometimes, the best ones in Leo’s opinion, they would just talk. They’d talk about their interest like their favorite movies and music. Other times they’d get more personally and talk about their worries and fears. 

On top of Neymar’s list of fears was playing Atletico Madrid. He didn’t like the way they fouled, it reminded him too much of his injury during World Cup. Their insults and threats that they shouted at him during the game didn’t help. Leo, like Neymar said, should know that Juanfran was out for his blood after all their history entailed. 

Leo knew he should have done better to rein in his own anger. Now, he was forced to deal with the guilt of hurting one of his good friends. 

But even Leo didn’t see this coming.

Neymar snuck up to Leo as they were walking back to the center line. He slung his arm around Leo and covered his mouth with his hand. Leo subconsciously moved closer to hear Neymar say, “Hey! You must be so happy now! You got another assist to add to your tally. Now you won’t look like a complete liability to this game!” Neymar’s sarcastic smile was the last thing Leo saw before he walked away. He couldn’t deal with all this right now. He just wanted to finish the game and drive far away from here, from everyone.

He watched the rest of the game as if it was a movie in front of him. He still participated, but he was nowhere near as focused as he should have been. The first action he witnessed before their opponents kicked off for a 3rd time was Suarez walking over to Neymar to whisper to him. They seemed to get into a heated conversation, but Leo had to look away lest he think more about what Neymar said. 

 

They won the game 3-1 with Suarez scoring a late goal from Neymar’s pass. The locker room was booming with excitement. Everyone but Leo and Neymar seemed to be having a good time. When the final whistle had blown, Leo had gone straight inside. He picked the corner cubby the furthest away from everyone and moved his stuff to it. He sat down with his back against the wall. He brought his legs up onto the bench and bent them. He crossed his arms on his knees and continued to stare at his feet while the rest of the team piled in. Everyone was smart enough to know not to bother him. They continued on with their celebrations as they changed. Most people were just finishing when Neymar came through the doors. Leo didn’t look up at his entrance, but he had heard everyone congratulating him for his goals. Neymar traveled over to his bag. He changed at an alarming rate to catch up to everyone else. 

His eyes moved over to Leo’s still form. He knew that Leo had probably been that way since the end of the game. He also knew that they needed to talk. Suarez had laid him straight after his second goal. Neymar couldn’t even believe he had said that to Leo. Sure, Leo had been cruel, but Neymar didn’t have to be an ass. He had forgiven Leo the moment he saw his startled reaction to what Neymar had said to him. He felt horrible for making him feel that way even if Leo had made him feel that way. All he wanted to do was make it right. Hopefully Leo didn’t hate him at the end of it. He really had no excuse for what he did, Leo was obviously having a hard time today and Neymar wasn’t helping.

He waited until most everyone had left to walk over to Leo’s motionless body. He didn’t know how to start talking. He had just begun to open his mouth when Leo said in a monotone voice, “Don’t. I can’t take your gloating or your horribly accurate words. I messed up, I know. You didn’t deserve that, I shouldn’t have taken my anger out on you. Just let me be for tonight and tomorrow you can tell me how much of a cruddy person you think I am. I just can’t handle it right now.” His voice had begun to break at the end. He looked away from his feet and buried his head into arms. 

“Leo…” 

“No. Stop. I hear the sympathy in your voice. I don’t need that. I don’t need your pity. I’m not trying to be dramatic, I’m being serious. I deserve this, I don’t deserve your compassion. I’m a horrible person.”

Neymar took one look at Leo and began to laugh. The more he thought about what Leo had said, the harder he laughed. He laughed until he was on the ground clutching his stomach. Leo’s head finally popped up long enough to see Neymar try to calm down. With one look at Leo’s expression, Neymar fell into another fit of giggles. 

“Stop laughing, I’m being serious!” Leo tried to reason as his own lips started to twitch. Seeing Neymar laugh was one of Leo’s favorite things in the world. His eyes would scrunch up into slits with laugh lines all around. His mouth would hang wide open with his pointy teeth sticking out and the noises that escaped were usually funnier than the actual joke. When Neymar laughed, Leo gave up all hope in denying his attraction to him.

‘I may not have to for much longer’ Leo thought as Neymar finally calmed down long enough to sit properly. They stared at each other for longer than they probably were supposed to, but neither of them wanted to break the silent, happy moment.

Neymar eventually looked up at Leo and suggested, “We should go somewhere and talk.”

Leo nodded and stood up. He changed into a t-shirt and sweatpants, much the same as Neymar’s. He threw his spikes and shin guards into his bag, and shoved his feet into a pair of tennis shoes. 

Neymar waited for him by the door. They walked out into the parking lot. In a silent agreement, they directed themselves towards Neymar’s car. Leo figured Neymar could drive him back there to get his own later. If they’re conversation lasted longer into the night, Neymar would probably offer for Leo to stay in the guest room. He had before on particular rough days that he didn’t want to return home to Anto.

Neymar drove out of the parking lot and then to his house within 10 minutes. They sat in silence for 2 of them until Neymar got restless and turned on some of his Brazilian music. By the time they got to the house, Leo was seriously contemplating whether or not Neymar was still punishing him with his music.

Neymar drove into his garage. He got out and went into the house without waiting to see if Leo was alright getting in. He went around throwing random misplaced items into more discrete places. When he was satisfied, he turned around to go find Leo, only to find him standing right behind him. Neymar jumped a foot making Leo smile a little. He navigated around Neymar to the couch. He sat down with his legs up again, but this time they huddle to his body and he was sitting straight forward. He leaned back and looked up at Neymar. 

“Do you want something to drink?” Neymar asked already walking to the kitchen. He got himself a beer, even though they had practice tomorrow. He waited for Leo to answer.

“A beer, please.”

So Leo wasn’t worried either about their practice tomorrow. It was supposed to be an easy one anyways. Neymar went back into the living room with their drinks and an ice pack. He had been hit hard in the side at some point during the game. He already had a bruise there, but he wanted to keep the swelling down. 

“Is that for your side?” Leo asked with a worried expression. Neymar nodded and sat down beside Leo. He handed him a beer and set his own down on the table. Leo followed suit and moved closer. “Can I see it?”

Neymar nodded again, this time raising his shirt. Leo’s fingers reached out to pull the shirt up more to get a better look. The bruise didn’t look like it would last long, but it looked hell of a lot hurtful. Leo could see red from the bursting of blood vessels beneath the skin. Above that were black, purple, and blue bruises. His fingertips skimmed the wounded area lightly. Any rage from before vanished from being directed towards Neymar and went right to his hatred for Juanfran. This wasn’t the first time he hurt Neymar and most likely wouldn’t be the last. 

“That little bastard needs to be taught a lesson,” Leo muttered as he reached across Neymar to grab the ice pack. He gingerly applied pressure with it to the bruise. When Leo pressed too hard, Neymar’s hand instinctively came down on his with a whimper. Their hands stayed there for a moment. They both looked into each other’s eyes.

“I’m sorry,” they both said. Leo gave Neymar a nod to go first.

“I shouldn’t have said that to you after my 2nd goal. It’s not true at all and was a low blow on my part. I also shouldn’t’ve called you an old man. You’re only like 4 years older than me and I know how self-conscious you get about your age. If I had a dollar for every time I saw you looking at your wrinkles in the mirror, I would have more money than you,” Leo smiled at that last comment, nudging Neymar’s shoulder. “I also shouldn’t’ve have yelled at you for how you were playing, I was just upset about you critiquing me. I was not playing my best today either and I had no reason to do that.”

Leo shook his head, “No you played great today,” Neymar looked away, “No really you did. You won the game for us. It was me that was screwing the team. You were right, I was a liability today. I should’ve been subbed off in the first half. My focus wasn’t there and I was just a disaster. You though,” Leo used his hand to turn Neymar’s face to his, “You were fantastic. I shouldn’t have snapped at you at half-time. I promise that I wasn’t really mad at you. You had just been an easy target for my angry.”

“Leo, I get it. You obviously aren’t having a good day. I can tell when something's wrong. I shouldn’t’ve taken what you said so personally. It was just, we were playing Atletico and tensions were already high. You know how I get when we play them. But seriously, don’t feel guilty. I completely forgive you. I know you didn’t mean it. So how about I order us a pizza and you can tell me what’s bothering you. Or you could just tell me you forgive me now and then, um, go home to Anto and Thiago.” Neymar had a hard time getting the last part out. He didn’t know if Leo had forgiven him and he didn’t want Leo to leave him for Anto. Neymar had always had an unnatural jealousy of her. He learned to rein it in most of the time, but he couldn’t help how he felt sometimes.

Leo looked away thinking. He didn’t want to go home. At the same time, he didn’t want to tell Neymar anything until he knew for sure what his plans were with Anto. He did want to tell Neymar everything, though. Get it all off his chest now. It seemed a good time as any. Anto probably didn’t expect him to come home at all tonight, so now was the perfect time. He would know everything for sure tomorrow and Neymar could help him through it.

Leo picked his beer up saying, “I don’t think going home is a good idea for me right now. So, I would like to stay here tonight, if you’ll have me,” Leo blushed at his own words. “I am glad to tell you what’s up with me. I hope it will shine some light on how I acted today. I don’t mean it as an excuse at all, but I hope it will help you cope with my bad behavior.”

“Yeah, sure. I’ll order us a pizza then. You can get settled here while I do. Help yourself to anything. The remote’s over there and I’ll be back,” Neymar stood up to grab his phone in the kitchen. “Large cheese pizza, I presume?”

“I’ll have whatever you want,” Leo said laying farther back in the couch. He contemplated how he was going to explain everything to Neymar. He didn’t know if he was going to just go for it, tell him absolutely everything, or just enough to generally explain things. He decided that Neymar deserved to know it all. 

Leo waited until the pizza arrived and finished off before he said anything about his situation to Neymar. In between, they talked about the game and how much they hated Juanfran. Neymar was just finishing the story of how he humiliated him with a nutmeg when Leo decided to start.

“Look I’m going to explain everything. I hope that you can be patient with me. I obviously am not a big talker of my family, even with you, so this will be hard for me,” he turned towards Neymar. Neymar replicated his movements until they facing each other head on. He put his hand on top of Leo’s to encourage him. Throughout his little speech, Leo felt Neymar move his thumb over his hand in a soothing gesture.

“You know that Anto’s pregnant again. At this point, she’s about 5 months along. I know this because about 3 months ago we went to the doctors to find out if she really was or not. He had told us then, of course, that she was 2 months along. This had confused me a little because, at time, the last time I remembered us having sex was 5 months before. This long abstinence had been for 2 reasons. One, you know I don’t like having sex right when were in the middle of so many important games. We never really have the time anyways, and I was too stressed from all that was going on to really worry about it. Two, at the time, Anto and I weren’t in the best place. When we had had sex all those months before, it had been because, for the first time in a while, we had had a good day. A great, romantic day that reminded me that I had loved her at one point. It was only days after that though, that everything just went downhill again. Anto had been more distant and hostile with me with every passing day. I didn’t know what to do. All my attempts at recollection were shot down. If it wasn’t for Thiago, I would have just given up. One look at him reminded me why I stayed with her.

“When I found out she was pregnant, my first thought was ‘Great, maybe this can save our relationship.’ I started to think about how having Thiago was such a joyous time for us. I was positive that this next one would be the same.” Leo scoffed, “Looking back on it, that might have been the only happy thought I had after hearing the news. The next ones ranged from ‘Oh c’mon I was just seriously contemplating leaving her’ to ‘I’m not ready for another baby at this point in my career’ to finally the most detrimental one ‘How could this baby be mine.’ She was not showing the signs that she did when she was 5 months along with Thiago. The fact that she had only come to me about it then was confusing to say the least. Instead of immediately confronting her about it, I made her go to the doctors to be sure. I knew it could not be mine. When the doctor said she was only 2 months along, I just looked at her. I wanted to see if she realized that it couldn’t possibly be mine, too. She kept a straight face though. I confronted her when we got home. If you asked her now, she still is adamant that it’s mine. The fact that she can convince herself of that after what she did is astounding.”

Leo took a moment to let his words sink in. He downed the rest of his beer and opened another. He needed it to continue. 

“What did she do?” Neymar asked, trying to keep his voice even. He knew where this was going, but he had to be sure. His hatred for Anto had already been risen to an alarming degree. He continued to try to keep his face blank as Leo spoke again.

“She had been seeing another guy behind my back for 4 months,” Leo swallowed around the lump in his throat. “She insisted that it wasn’t my fault, that she was respecting my ‘No-sex-in-the-middle-of-the-season rule’ a rule that mind you I always break. She said he was only there for sexual desire, no feelings were attached. I guess she thought that would make me feel better. It didn’t. Cheating is cheating, no matter what form. 

“When she realized that that tactic wasn’t going to work, she went on to actually blaming me. She said that none of this would have happened if I had just asked her to marry me,” Leo looked down at his hands. He didn’t know when Neymar’s hand had left his and instead rested on his thigh. Leo hands had subconsciously started to wring together. He pressed on, “I can’t tell you the exact reason I never asked. Recently it had been since the distance. She didn’t like that answer. We fought about it until I made her promise that we’d go get it tested as being mine. She only agreed because I really think she thinks it is mine. My fears and anger escalated today because the results are in tomorrow. 

“All I know is that if it is mine, I will stay with her for the sake of the kids. I don’t want them growing up with split parents. If it isn’t mine, then I will leave her. I will get full custody of Thiago and move on with my life. I can’t deny that I hope that it isn’t. I feel horrible for the child leaving, him alone like that, but I can’t continue this relationship like that. It’s not healthy for me. I’ve already accepted the fact that I don’t love her anymore. I haven’t for a while.”

Leo stopped. This was the moment. He had to decide whether or not he risk their friendship. Geri was the only one that knew about how he felt. He told Leo that he had to be true to himself. He said that Neymar deserved to know the truth and that he might be shocked of how he reacts. Leo’s final thought was that he deserved to be happy after all this time.

He took Neymar’s hands in his own. Neymar let him play with them for a bit. He didn’t want to do anything to disrupt Leo lest he stop talking. They had had nights before where they talk about their feelings and such before, but never was Leo as open as this. Leo usually let Neymar do the talking. He was a much better listener than speaker and here he was giving a god damn memoir. He had gotten this far though and he intended to finish. 

He looked into Neymar’s eyes and said, “I mostly have been seriously thinking about leaving her, because of…” it was now or never. Leo had to tell him. Neymar was listening with rapt attention he nodded his head and squeezed Leo’s hands to encourage him to continue. “Because of you, Ney, because of you. When I realized I didn’t love Anto anymore, I started to think about the other loves of my life to try to compare them. My mind went to you first, though. Before I had never thought of you that way, but as I sat there and tried to think about where it all went wrong, it was because of you. Once you had become a constant in my life, I realized that I liked you probably more than I should. I never intended to do anything with this information, though. I had Anto and Thiago, you didn’t fit in the picture. I let my little crush drift away. We became best friends and I couldn’t continue to think of you that way. It wasn’t until Anto was going out of the picture that I let myself think of you like that at all. Geri had guessed before that I liked you. I came to him with my problem and he helped me to see my real feelings for you. 

“Still though, Anto was there. And well now, she’s almost not. I wanted to wait to tell you after I had the results. I didn’t want to ruin our friendship until I was sure that I could be with you, if you even feel the same that is. But, as you can see, I couldn’t wait. I’ve waited so long and I just couldn’t anymore,” Leo looked up at Neymar’s shocked face. He put his hand on his cheek. Neymar raised one of his to Leo’s while he laced their other fingers together. Leo took one breathe and finished his statement, “Ney, I don’t know how it happened, but I have fallen for you. I love you,” and with that Leo leaned forward. Neymar meet him half way with a heart-wrenching kiss. Their lips melded together perfectly. Leo’s hand moved from Neymar’s cheek to the back of his head. Neymar’s own hand moved to the back of Leo’s arm. They both tried to pull each other closer. 

After a few minutes, Neymar broke away. He leaned farther back onto the couch pulling Leo on top of him. He had wanted this for so long and he planned to enjoy every minute of it. He discarded the ice pack on the ground and looked back up into Leo’s eyes. He smiled and said “I love you, too. More than you could ever know.”

At the moment, he didn’t care if the baby ended up being Leo’s. He didn’t care that tomorrow Leo might go back to the mother of his children. All he cared about was proving his love to Leo. 

They started kissing again. This time, Leo’s one hand, still laced with Neymar’s, was on the couch beside Ney’s head, holding him up. His other hand had found purchase on Neymar’s side. He made sure it was the one uninjured. He rubbed along his stomach over his shirt for bit before it went under the material. Neymar gasped into the kiss. His own hands were fisted in Leo’s hair and shirt. 

Neymar’s hips had thrust upward when Leo’s hand moved to his ass. The hand was over his shorts, but Neymar still felt the electricity. He said sorry over and over again as he tried to calm down. He didn’t know how far Leo wanted to go and he really didn’t want to drive him away. 

Leo hushed him. He laid his whole body weight onto Neymar. He wanted to show him he was just as aroused. Leo put his forehead against Neymar’s. He opened his eyes, waiting for Neymar to do the same. When he finally calmed down a little, Neymar opened his eyes to Leo. They breathed each other’s air for a bit not saying anything. Leo moved their laced hands to his mouth. He kissed Neymar’s hand not breaking eye contact. Neymar’s breathe came out even more shaken. He didn’t understand how Leo could be this loving during a time like this. Ney felt how hard they were in their sweatpants. All he could think about was getting off, but Leo brought his attention back. 

He kissed every individual knuckle. Neymar couldn’t help himself when he stuck his middle finger up as Leo made his way around again. Leo glared at him, but he entertained him by kissing the tip of the finger. He nibbled the end of it resulting in Neymar’s eyes widening and ripping his hands away. Leo smiled down at him. Neymar replicated it back. He moved to kiss Leo again when he suddenly moved back to stand. Neymar’s face must have shown the hurt of what he thought was rejection because Leo quickly leaned down and kissed him. He found his hands again and pulled Neymar up.

“I, um, thought we could continue this somewhere else, maybe, if you want,” Leo said unsure of himself. Neymar smiled at his adorableness. He nodded his head. Neymar began to lead him to his room. At the bottom of the stairs, he stopped.

“Could you, um, actually wait here a minute? I just need to get ready a little,” Neymar said nervously.

“I don’t care if your rooms messy, Ney. You didn’t expect something like this to happen, it’s not your fault.”

“Mhmm, but you haven’t seen a room like mine. Look it’ll just take a second I promise,” Neymar said already running up the stairs. Leo watched him go with a laugh. He couldn’t believe how much love he felt for him in that moment. 

Leo thought it would be good time to better prepare himself for this. He walked over to bag. He discarded his phone and socks inside. He took out a mint and his cologne. He sprayed himself quickly and put it all. He popped the mint in his mouth. He wrapped his mind around the fact that he was about to finally have sex with Neymar. He decided not to worry about anything else at this moment. He pushed everything from his mind and stood up. He walked up the stairs to what he assumed was Neymar’s room. He heard him rustling around inside. He heard a thump and then a silent ‘fuck’. Leo took a step back when he heard Neymar walking to the door. Even with the precautionary step backwards, Neymar still ran into him on his way to go get him.

Neymar looked up from his place in Leo’s arms. Leo smiled down at him with fondness. He helped Neymar to a standing position. He began to kiss him right there in the hallway. It still wasn’t close enough for Neymar though. He took Leo’s hands and guided them to the back of his thighs. Leo got the message immediately. He broke away from the kiss and said, “Jump.”

Neymar eagerly leaped into his arms. He wrapped his legs around Leo’s waist and his arms around his neck. Leo’s hands moved to his ass. They kissed for a little while more. Leo adjusted Neymar in his arms getting ready to move them into the bedroom. Neymar was jostled in arms. He decided that now was the time to move on from Leo’s lip to his neck in hopes it was just as soft. He sucked on Leo’s neck as they moved into his room. Leo protested at a particularly hard bite from Neymar’s pointy teeth. 

“Mmm, don’t be a baby, baby,” Neymar moaned as he was thrown on the bed. Leo crawled up to his face.

“It’s not my fault you have vampire teeth. Seriously, do you go around biting people’s necks like that, sucking their blood out?”

“Only on the weekends,” Neymar moaned again as Leo brought his crotch down to his. He felt Leo smile into their kiss that he started up again. Neymar’s hands immediately found their way under Leo’s shirt. He rubbed his hands up Leo’s chest until the shirt was around his armpits. Leo took that moment to break away and pull his shirt over his head. He also took the time to look around. He noticed now that the lights were off, but the room was being illuminated by candles all over. He looked down at Neymar, who had just started to pull his shirt off. Leo reached down to help get it passed his head. 

“The candles were a nice touch,” Leo said as Neymar’s face came into view. He threw the shirt away to see Neymar’s face heat up. 

“Shut up, ok? I thought it’d be a nice gesture, romantic even,” Neymar muttered through the arms he had just put over his face. Leo nudged them to try to get him to remove them. Neymar huffed and put his arms even farther over his face. Leo grabbed them and forcibly pulled them above Neymar’s head. He refused to look at Leo.

“Ney,” Leo purred. Neymar still refused to look at Leo in his embarrassment. Leo finally grabbed both of Neymar’s wrist with one hand. He used the other to turn Neymar’s face to his. “I love the gesture. I find it very romantic and cute,” Neymar rolled his eyes at the word cute. Leo tapped his cheek to bring back his attention. He stroked along his jaw. “I don’t seem like the kind of guy who would like this kind of stuff, but I do. I hope to one day show how corny and romantic I can be.”

Neymar shook his head, “Let’s not think about the future right now. Let’s worry about the here and now, ok?”

Leo looked into Neymar’s eyes. He saw them silently plead to him not to remind him of everything and just continue. After a beat, Leo nodded and reached down to kiss him. Neymar licked his lips, introducing tongues immediately. His hands found their way to Leo’s waistband, signaling to Leo he wanted them off. Leo got up off the bed. He kept eye contact with Neymar as he pulled both his boxers and pants down. He silently watched Neymar’s eyes trail down his body. He saw his eyes dilate as he got lower.

Now, Leo wasn’t a very proud person when it came to his body. He got self-conscious whenever someone stared at it for too long. This moment was no different. He felt his face heat up as Neymar made his way back up to his face. 

“Look whose embarrassed now,” Neymar observed. He pushed himself up onto his elbows to get an even better look at Leo’s body. He shamelessly let his eyes travel to Leo’s cock again. He completely took his lower lip into his mouth. He looked up at Leo raising his eyebrows. 

“Shut up,” Leo replied. He decided the next best thing to do was get Neymar naked too in hopes that he wouldn’t be as cocky as he is now. He reached for Neymar’s waistband. Neymar lifted up a little to let Leo rip his pants and boxers down. 

Neymar honestly didn’t have much to be cocky with in the crotch region. He was never ashamed of his size though, and he made up for it with eagerness. As soon as all the clothes were tossed aside, Neymar dragged Leo back down onto him. He kissed him insistently. He wrapped his legs around Leo’s waist, rubbing their cocks together. Neymar brazenly moaned out as Leo moved to his neck. His heart was beating at an alarming rate and he thought he had never been this aroused before. He thought that there had already been enough interruptions. Neymar pulled Leo up to his face. 

“I have stuff in the drawer,” Leo looked from him to the drawer. He reached over to open it. He found lube and a condom on top of the clutter. He pulled it out to look at. He looked at it and then to Neymar. 

“Are you sure? I don’t want to pressure you into this or go too fast.”

“I’m sure. I’ve wanted this for so long. Plus this might be my only chance to…” Neymar trailed off. He threw Leo a half smile and a shrug. Leo looked back at the items in his hands. He wanted to make Neymar feel good. He wanted to prove to him that he did in fact love him. He leaned down and kissed Neymar, putting as much emotion into it as he could. When Leo pulled back, Neymar unwrapped his legs from his waist. He moved until he was flipped over on his stomach and slightly raised his ass. 

“Have you ever done this before?” Leo asked. He put the condom down for now and opened the lube. 

“Bottom or be with another guy?”

“Either.”

“I never bottomed before, but I have topped once.”

“Really? With whom?” Leo asked out of curiosity. He felt the same rush in stomach as he had early in the day when he saw Neymar with Geri when he thought of Neymar with another guy.

“Um, it was Oscar. We were hanging out one day on international break when we got kinda drunk. We started talking about these types of things and we both realized we had never done it before with another guy, so one thing lead to another and we did it. It never happened again and we never really talk about it. We pretend it didn’t happen mostly, it was a very embarrassing moment.” Neymar buried his face into the pillow. They both had regretted it the next day. It had put a little strain in their friendship, but they got past it. He hoped the same would happen with Leo. Neymar did think to add, “I have fingered myself before.” 

Leo moaned quietly at the thought of Neymar opening himself up. “I, um, haven’t been with a guy. Either ways. You’re my first,” Leo declared. He finally began to slick his fingers up. He may not have had the experience, but he did know what he was doing. He set the lube aside and braced one hand on Neymar’s uninjured hip. He looked up to see him clenching the bed sheets in anticipation. His face was still buried in the pillow. “Hey, babe, look at me.”

Neymar’s heart jumped at the endearment. He reluctantly shifted his head to the side, looking over his shoulder at Leo. Leo smiled at him. He leaned down and locked Neymar’s lips in a kiss as his first fingers breached him. Neymar whined into the kiss pushing his hips back. They continue to awkwardly kiss as Leo’s first finger opened him. After a while, Neymar whimpered, "More.”

The noise went straight to Leo’s cock. Leo moved back. Neymar let his head fall back to the pillow as he felt Leo introducing a second finger. This one made for a tighter squeeze, but, after the pain past, it was far more pleasurable than just one. Neymar unabashedly let out moan after moan. He gripped the sheets with more urgency. He pushed his hips back when Leo found his prostate. The noise he let out should’ve have been embarrassing for him, but he was already too far gone. 

Leo smirked at the withering boy beneath him. He began to kiss up and down Neymar’s back. He thrust his fingers in and out of Neymar fervently. He decided that he was ready enough for a third finger. This was the hardest one to push in. He let his fingers in there so Neymar could adjust.

Neymar straight out whined when the third finger was completely in. His face scrunched up and he gritted his teeth. Leo leaned down and rubbed away his frown lines. He kissed him all over his face. “Hey I got you. Don’t worry, I’m here,” he kissed his lips. “I love you.”

Neymar had forgotten about the pain long enough for Leo’s fingers to start to move. In a few moments, the pain subsided and pleasure filled Neymar. His breathing and moaning were uncontrollable. He buried his head back into the pillow. He raised himself up and back even farther into Leo’s fingers. 

“I’m good, I’m good,” Neymar insisted. Leo continued to thrust his fingers in, hitting Neymar’s prostate. Neymar groaned as Leo continued. He reached back to grab Leo’s arm. He did it to steady himself and to stop Leo.

Leo pulled fingers out, wiping them on the corner of the bed. He backed off enough of Neymar that Neymar was able to flip over onto his back. In the corner of his eye, Neymar saw something glimmer from the candle light. He reached over and grabbed the condom. He opened it with his teeth. He sat up to put it on Leo. 

As Neymar rolled it down Leo’s thick cock, he wondered how it would feel completely inside him. There was no doubt that it would hurt. He knew that it would test his limits. In that moment though, he wasn’t worried. He wanted to make Leo feel good, to prove his love to him. 

Neymar moved back up the bed and opened his legs, bending them. Leo grabbed the lube and slicked himself up. He bent over Neymar and kissed him. He moved Neymar’s legs even farther apart. Neymar’s hands went to Leo’s hair and back. He felt Leo’s cock at his entrance, teasing him. He bucked his hips up to show his eagerness. He found, happily, that he wasn’t as freaked out about this as he thought he would be. He figured it was because his love for Leo over powered every other emotion.

Leo grabbed his cock and Neymar’s hip. He looked down to line his cock up with Neymar’s hole. After a beat, he pushed in. Little by little he pressed in. Neymar’s face scrunched up in pain again. Once Leo was fully in, he leaned down to kiss all over his face again. He felt Neymar’s nails scratch down his back as his other hand gripped his hair. Leo tried to kiss away the pain. He wanted to at least distract him enough to calm down.

“Ney, Ney its ok. I got you, I’m here. It’ll feel better if you just relax. Shh, you’re fine, focus on me, focus on my voice, on my lips,” Leo kissed Neymar with earnest. Neymar’s hand began to loosen in Leo’s hair. He wrapped both his arms around Leo’s neck, holding him there. After a few more minutes, Neymar bucked his hips up. Leo took that as a sign to start moving. He slowly pulled his cock out and pushed back in. The pace was slow until Neymar started moaning again. Leo picked up speed with his thrust. He moved his lips down to Neymar’s neck, so he could hear all the sweet noises he made.

“You’re amazing, fantastic, stunning. Neymar you truly are so goddamn beautiful,” Leo let praises fall from his mouth to reassure Neymar. He never felt truer love in any other moment than this one. His breathe quickened as he got closer and closer to the edge. Neymar’s moans came out more rapidly, confirming that he, too, was just as close. 

Leo’s hands gripped Neymar’s thighs roughly. He pushed in as deep as he was allowed. Neymar’s hand that had begun to move all over Leo’s back before now were lost in Leo’s hair. He whimpered as Leo hit his prostate, simulating his cock.

“Leo, please,” Neymar pleaded. He reached down and grabbed Leo’s hand. He led it to his own cock. Leo let him wrap his hand around it. Neymar’s back arched beautifully as he finally got some relief. With the pleasure he was receiving all over, Neymar knew he wouldn’t last much longer. 

Leo jerked Neymar off quickly, matching his own thrust. In no time at all though, his thrust got sloppier. He rushed forward to kiss Neymar. He whispered “I love you,” right as he began to let go. With a deep thrust right at his prostate, Neymar came all over his and Leo’s chest. He moaned Leo’s name through it all. He subconsciously squeezed tight around Leo’s cock, simulating Leo’s own orgasm. Leo let out this first real moan he’s had since they began with silent whispers of Neymar’s name. 

Leo fucked Neymar through the end of his orgasm. He slowed to a stop when it was over. After a few moments, Leo pulled out of Neymar discarding the condom in the trash. He walked to the bathroom and grabbed a wash cloth, wetting it. He cleaned off his body and then turned it inside out. He walked back over to Neymar. 

Neymar laid on the bed with eyes closed and his limbs spread out. Leo thought that Neymar had never looked so beautiful than he did right now. He stood over admiring his body until Neymar opened his eyes. Their gaze met immediately, like it always does. Leo set about cleaning Neymar up. Neymar watched Leo’s every move. He whimpered a little when Leo began to clean off his cock. It was far too sensitive to touch this soon. 

When Leo finished, he tossed the cloth behind him. He climbed onto the bed, pulling the covers up. He laid on his side facing a boneless Neymar. He placed his hand down on Neymar’s chest. He rubbed up and down the toned area until Neymar placed his hand on his.

“Hey,” Leo said dumbly.

“Hey,” Neymar replied, equally as dumb. He began to giggle at their stupidity. Leo joined in a second later. 

Leo moved until he was leaning against the head board. He shifted Neymar onto his chest and between his legs. He laid his hands Neymar’s stomach. Neymar laid his own onto of his. He once again laced their fingers together. 

They laid like that for a long while. Neither of them moved or broke the silence for the duration. Finally Neymar’s thoughts got the better of him.

“Are you really going to stay with her if it’s yours?” Neymar asked.

“I feel like I have too. I want to apart of both their lives as much as I can be and if we did split up, she’d just move back to Argentina and I’d never see them. If it’s not mine, which as I said before, I’m most positive it isn’t, then I will get custody of Thiago and be rid of her. None of this is the ideal, I know. I don’t want to be with her, I want to be with you. But even then, that would be a whole new adventure of its own. We obviously couldn’t be publically together until the subsequent end of our careers.”

“I don’t need to be public, I just want to be with you,” Neymar said sitting up. He turned around and straddled Leo’s hips. He put both of his hands on either side of Leo’s face. “It doesn’t have to be this way, you don’t have to stay with her if it’s yours. You can work it out so that you financially support her here in Barcelona until they’re both old enough and then you can get custody of them. Or she could go back to Argentina and you work out an agreement like Caroline and I have. It’s not the best, I don’t see Davi as much as I want to, but it works. Leo, you deserve to be happy, and staying with her obviously doesn’t make you happy. It makes you miserable and angry. You snap at your friends and you can’t work properly.

“I’m not gonna tell you what to do, but that’s what I think you should do. I just want you to know that I’m here in any way, shape, or form for you. If you want to just be friends, I can do that. May take me a while, but I can. If you want more, I can do that too. That’s honestly what I want. Just let me know, ok? I’ll wait for your answer tomorrow when you have the results. Until then, let’s just go to sleep. I’m tired, it’s been one long, emotional day. I wouldn’t change it though,” Neymar leaned forward and kissed Leo’s forehead. He pulled back, looking in his eyes.

“I love you,” Leo professed. 

“I know you do. I love you, too”

They laid back down, unsure of how tomorrow was going to go. Neymar fell asleep in Leo’s arms first. Leo stayed up for a little while longer. He thought of all that had happened today. He thought about his son, and how important he was to him. He thought about Anto, about how he used to love her. But he never loved her like this. He never loved her with every fiber of his being like he did Neymar. He thought more about the boy who laid in his arms. He thought of his smile, his laugh. He thought of his most recent words to him. By the end of all the rationalizing, he knew that if he was sure about anything, it was that he didn’t want to let this boy go. He had his flaws, sure. He talked too loud, acted too cocky, and cared way too much about his looks, but he was also kind, joyous, and funny. 

Leo knew that no matter what tomorrow brought that he would hold on to Neymar until he no longer wanted him. With these pleasant thoughts in mind, Leo fell asleep.


End file.
